BariatricEating.com Health & Nutrition

Rant - Guest rant!

Our first Guest Rant

My name is Jan and I'm Member # 71 on the Before and After Message Board. Each month Susan Maria writes a rant and each month I wonder how she got into my head, extracted the words and phrases that were there, and put them into cyber space! Because she writes what I am thinking, this month I decided to take a crack at it myself! Maybe you won't even notice the difference!

The subject of my rant is unrealistic expectations in new post-ops. I'm wondering where these expectations came from in the first place? Who told them to expect to lose a pound a day for days, weeks or months on end? Where did any of them get the notion that because they have had Weight Loss Surgery, that there would be no "plateaus" or stalls in their weight loss journey?

Over and over on ALL weight loss surgery message boards I see similar posts. Not losing fast enough. Losing a lot in the first few weeks, then not losing at all in week 3 or 4 and thinking they are "the one" that the surgery failed. By the way, has anyone EVER heard of a surgery failure where the patient lost for 3 weeks, dropped from 282 to 263 and held that weight for life??

Losing 2 pounds a week means a loss of over 100 pounds in a year's time. And this isn't fast enough? How fast did you expect it to be? You say you're eating well under 1,000 calories per day. You know very well, don't you, that there is NO chance at all that you're not losing, right?? Surely you don't think that you'll maintain your present weight at this rate of intake??? Losing a pound a day is unrealistic. Now, I may have lost that fast for about a WEEK post-op, but after that, I lost at a much slower rate! Some lose a bit faster or have more to lose and some lose a bit slower or have less to lose. In my first year I discovered that we are all going to be a year older this time next year anyway, so we should enjoy our journey!

I believe the message board at Before & After was created for support and encouragement, but we need to think a little before we post sometimes. In our pre-op lives, when did we lose 2 pounds a week on any kind of a steady basis? If we did, when did we continue that loss ALL the way to our goal weight?? I would encourage the new posties to save their posts like this in a file on their computer somewhere and pull it out, like a time capsule, a year from now. They will laugh at themselves. Guaranteed.

I realize I'm not the board police (although I just KNOW I'll be labeled as the Scale Nazi!!), but I think asking for help with REAL problems is more the purpose of this board. I know that to the new postie, this IS a real problem, but it's just not. And I have seen over and over again that this sort of post has a way of leading to more and more of the same. I have a simple solution and I know that some of you have been waiting this entire rant for me to say the magic words. Here they are:

Step Away From The Scale.

The scale lies. It tells you a number and we think we're good or bad based on that number. It does not take our behavior into consideration, or how little we have been eating or how much we have been exercising. It only knows a number and we make judgements on ourselves based on this. During the weight loss phase, we need to concentrate on healing first, then retraining our thoughts about food and learn good, new behaviors and making better food choices for the future. To weigh ourselves once in a while may keep us on track, but to weigh all the time is a distraction and can be so discouraging until we get to the maintenance phase. So again, to the new post-ops... Step Away From The Scale. Once a month should be enough! Really!

To the new post-op, congratulations on your weight loss procedure! You ARE going to have a wonderful year and I repeat, enjoy your journey!!!! Relax and have FUN with it. This year is going to be a time of fantastic change! Just like we tell our kids to not grow up so fast, don't worry about losing so fast! You have issues to deal with as the weight comes off! Take the time to deal with them, make the necessary changes in your life and thinking and as you reach your goal, prepare for the lifelong maintenance phase!!!! And when problems come up, I hope to see you posting at Before & After to get some good advice and encouragement from those who have gone before.

Jan